In news sure to shock the stuffy world of elite academia, Brown University announced today their intention to drop out of the Ivy League and instead pursue their true passion of photography. “I’ve pretended to be something I’m not since 1764, and it’s about time I chase my real dreams—I’m not getting any younger after all,” said the centuries old institution of higher … [Read more...] about Brown University Drops Out Of Ivy League To Pursue Career In Photography
National News
‘I Named 3 Freakin’ Dogs After You!’ Patriots Fans React To Brady Retirement Snub
The GOAT Tom Brady formally announced his retirement from the NFL after 22 seasons and 7 Super Bowl Titles. While there will be plenty of time to celebrate his storied career, New England fans couldn’t help but notice the lack of Patriots love in his retirement announcement. Here’s how some reacted: “What a waste of a 6th round pick!” - Pam, Worcester “I’ll never wear … [Read more...] about ‘I Named 3 Freakin’ Dogs After You!’ Patriots Fans React To Brady Retirement Snub
Man Who Didn’t Cry At Own Father’s Funeral Posts Teary-Eyed Tribute About Tom Brady Retiring
“Brady was like a father to me, even though I’m 10 years older than him,” said Medford resident Louie Palanzo in a tear-filled Facebook live video stream. “He was always there for me, through the thick and thin, every season. After my old man kicked the bucket, I cheered myself up watching the Pats at the wake. His retirement is without a doubt the saddest moment of my entire … [Read more...] about Man Who Didn’t Cry At Own Father’s Funeral Posts Teary-Eyed Tribute About Tom Brady Retiring
Belichick Promises To Resume Cheating In 2022 For Sake Of Patriots Fans
In an announcement sure to appease hurting Pats fans everywhere, Bill Belichick told reporters today that next season, the team will “most likely” bring back cheating to avoid another heartbreak season. “Suffering through a 47-17 loss to the Buffalo Bills can have a devastating impact on the mental and physical health of our fan base,” Belichick said. “You know me, I’m … [Read more...] about Belichick Promises To Resume Cheating In 2022 For Sake Of Patriots Fans
Interest In Attending University of Vermont Still Best Way To Find Out If Your Kid Smokes Weed
Since 1791, parents have relied on their teen’s stated interest in going to UVM for college as a proxy to tell if they smoke weed. A new study has confirmed that in 2021, an application to UVM was more predictive that your kid blows mad tree than any other factor, including them saying “I literally smoke weed all the time.” “When my little Tommy told us he heard … [Read more...] about Interest In Attending University of Vermont Still Best Way To Find Out If Your Kid Smokes Weed