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‘Wait, We’re On Lockdown Again?’ Asks Vermonter Who Hasn’t Seen Another Human In Months Anyway

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Esra Danville of Vermont’s Northeast Kingdom spent the last few weeks doing what he normally does: canning and pickling vegetables, butchering one of his cows, and chopping 3 large trees worth of firewood to heat his remote cabin this winter. It wasn’t until he turned on Vermont Public Radio that he discovered the state was on lockdown again due to rising cases of Covid-19. … [Read more...] about ‘Wait, We’re On Lockdown Again?’ Asks Vermonter Who Hasn’t Seen Another Human In Months Anyway

Now That Pats Suck, Local Man Has No Choice But To Get To Know Family

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With the New England Patriots recording their worst season in nearly 20 years, local Braintree man Mikey Brown has surprisingly found himself getting to know his family. “The Pats have just been good for so long that I haven’t had a lazy Sunday in years. Now I’m looking around and realizing I should probably get to know my kids,” he added. Brown’s children, ages 5 and 9, … [Read more...] about Now That Pats Suck, Local Man Has No Choice But To Get To Know Family

Scalpers Spotted Outside Fenway Park Selling Ballots For Half Price

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After early voting started this week at Fenway Park, scalpers were spotted outside the historic stadium selling discount ballots to Boston voters.  “I got one for Biden, two for Trump, and twelve for Jo Jorgensen,” said scalper Dave O’Connor, displaying a jacket pocket full of crumbled up ballots. “Lowest I’ll go is $50, these are selling for at least double … [Read more...] about Scalpers Spotted Outside Fenway Park Selling Ballots For Half Price

Maine Oyster Farmers Struggle To Meet Susan Collins’ Pearl-Clutching Demands

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What began as a boon for the Maine oyster industry has quickly soured as the demand for pearls that Senator Susan Collins can clutch has far exceeded supply. "When Senator Collins was attacked for her response to Brett Kavanaugh's Supreme Court nomination, we knew she'd be calling us for a necklace’s worth of clutching pearls," said Jim Daniels of the Maine Oyster Farmers … [Read more...] about Maine Oyster Farmers Struggle To Meet Susan Collins’ Pearl-Clutching Demands