“Eagles and Terriers don’t normally get along. But we will happily join forces to destroy Pilgrims,” explain a BC student. … [Read more...] about Touching: BC And BU Students Bond Over Mutual Hatred Of Harvard Students
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Bostonians Panic Over Lack Of Equivocating White Men In Mayoral Election
BOSTON—Recent polling results suggest that citizens of Boston are increasingly worried about the startling lack of blah, noncommittal white men running for mayor in this year’s election. In a historic first for the city, the mayoral race includes approximately zero confused-looking middle-aged white dudes spouting nonsense and palaver. Reports suggest many voters are … [Read more...] about Bostonians Panic Over Lack Of Equivocating White Men In Mayoral Election
Allston Christmas Grinch Takes All The Good Presents For Himself
A local Ebenezer Scrooge was recently spotted ruining Allston Christmas by stealing all the best street gifts using a large green truck. “I saw him take a totally decent, formerly-white couch and just drive off,” stated one shaken onlooker. “He took stuff from literally every house. What a greedy jerk.” The thief, who called himself “the garbageman,” was seen taking his … [Read more...] about Allston Christmas Grinch Takes All The Good Presents For Himself
Local Terrier Named Goodest Boy In Boston
BOSTON—On Monday, Perfect Puppers magazine officially named local terrier Mr. Riggs the goodest boy in all of Boston. Though the competition was tough, the 14-pound terrier with a heart of solid gold beat out 235 other notable woofers, doggos, and chonky floofs across the city. By successfully completing a trifecta of flawless “stays,” “drop-its,” and “down-boys,” Mr. Riggs … [Read more...] about Local Terrier Named Goodest Boy In Boston
Scientists Warn Climate Change May Extend Iced Coffee Season Indefinitely
“Our planet is not ready for the disastrous possibility that iced coffee season will soon be all year round,” said an MIT climate scientist, who led the research. “Heat wave after record heat wave, our country is turning to iced coffee permanently as a makeshift solution to cool off. But we simply do not have the resources to support this change on a global … [Read more...] about Scientists Warn Climate Change May Extend Iced Coffee Season Indefinitely