"Sure, the suspicious package thing may have just been a big ruse for some dude to criticize Mark Zuckerberg,“ said Northeastern sophomore Evan Griswold. "But it still had more truth to it than my roommate talking about his 'girlfriend' who he swears is 'very cool' and ‘goes to Tufts which is too far for her to visit.’ Sure.” … [Read more...] about Fake Exploding Package At Northeastern Still More Real Than Roommate’s Girlfriend Who ‘Just Goes To A Different School’
College
Williams Graduate Pretty Pretentious About Going To A ‘Little Ivy,’ Whatever That Means
For James Whitefield III, who graduated from Williams in May, going to a ‘Little Ivy’ is a pretty big deal. But to everyone outside his Boston Brahmin circle, it’s not actually a thing. “Actually, Williams routinely ranks as a top liberal arts college in the US News & World Report. We are like a mini Harvard or Yale, but us Ephs, as we like to call ourselves, are a rarer … [Read more...] about Williams Graduate Pretty Pretentious About Going To A ‘Little Ivy,’ Whatever That Means
Brave Harvard Student Steps Out In Public Not Wearing Single Item Of Harvard Branded Clothing
“Today I wanted to see what it felt like to just be treated like everyone else. So I put on my Golden Goose sneakers, grabbed my Hermès backpack, and left my Harvard pullover at home. Honestly, it’s been scary but sort of freeing.” Sources say the student eventually put on a Harvard hat she carries for emergencies after someone cut her in line at Tatte. … [Read more...] about Brave Harvard Student Steps Out In Public Not Wearing Single Item Of Harvard Branded Clothing
Help! I Went To A Crazy MIT Party And Now I’m Stuck In The Metaverse
Please, I'm begging you…. I don't know what the hell I smoked but now I'm trapped here. It’s just empty work spaces, framed NFTs, and some nerdy looking avatars talking about made up units called smoots! … [Read more...] about Help! I Went To A Crazy MIT Party And Now I’m Stuck In The Metaverse
Brown University Drops Out Of Ivy League To Pursue Career In Photography
In news sure to shock the stuffy world of elite academia, Brown University announced today their intention to drop out of the Ivy League and instead pursue their true passion of photography. “I’ve pretended to be something I’m not since 1764, and it’s about time I chase my real dreams—I’m not getting any younger after all,” said the centuries old institution of higher … [Read more...] about Brown University Drops Out Of Ivy League To Pursue Career In Photography