“How was I supposed to know this would happen? It was truly unforeseeable. Brett seemed so sweet and as a Mainer, I only see the good in people.” … [Read more...] about Susan Collins: ‘I’m Just As Shocked As You Are!’
Maine
Rising Gas Prices Force Mainers To Switch To Moxie As Fuel
Did you know that unleaded Moxie, while incredibly toxic, is 5x more powerful as a vehicle fueling agent than gasoline? Well, Mainers did! That’s why they’re buying the soda in bulk and filling up their trucks with it. Go get some while you still can! Results may vary. We claim no liability for any damages. … [Read more...] about Rising Gas Prices Force Mainers To Switch To Moxie As Fuel
Maine Holding On To ‘Vacationland’ Title As If The Caribbean Doesn’t Exist
AUGUSTA, ME — Despite the countless other tourist spots around the globe more deserving of the title, Maine has once again declared itself “Vacationland.” “For the 86th year, we are pleased to announce that we are the undisputed ‘Vacationland,’” said Lindsay Weber of the Maine Tourism Board (MTB). “Maine is a world-famous destination uniquely deserving of the title, … [Read more...] about Maine Holding On To ‘Vacationland’ Title As If The Caribbean Doesn’t Exist
Maine Oyster Farmers Struggle To Meet Susan Collins’ Pearl-Clutching Demands
What began as a boon for the Maine oyster industry has quickly soured as the demand for pearls that Senator Susan Collins can clutch has far exceeded supply. "When Senator Collins was attacked for her response to Brett Kavanaugh's Supreme Court nomination, we knew she'd be calling us for a necklace’s worth of clutching pearls," said Jim Daniels of the Maine Oyster Farmers … [Read more...] about Maine Oyster Farmers Struggle To Meet Susan Collins’ Pearl-Clutching Demands