“Our planet is not ready for the disastrous possibility that iced coffee season will soon be all year round,” said an MIT climate scientist, who led the research. “Heat wave after record heat wave, our country is turning to iced coffee permanently as a makeshift solution to cool off. But we simply do not have the resources to support this change on a global … [Read more...] about Scientists Warn Climate Change May Extend Iced Coffee Season Indefinitely
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Gov. Baker Announces Boston’s Nonexistent Nightlife Can Finally Reopen
BOSTON—Slowly pumping his fist behind the podium, Governor Charlie Baker announced that Boston’s virtually nonexistent nightlife could finally reopen this weekend. “Over the past year, the late-night social scene of our capital city has been stunted by the pandemic. I’m excited to usher in a return to normalcy by opening all clubs and bars back to their former glory of … [Read more...] about Gov. Baker Announces Boston’s Nonexistent Nightlife Can Finally Reopen
Bruins Fan Celebrates Victory Over Capitals By Happily Punching New Hole In Wall
“To be fair, if we had lost the series I was gonna punch a hole in the wall too,” said Mickey Porter, grinning ear to ear as he pulled his bruised fist from the drywall. “Punching and hitting stuff is how I express all my emotions.” Porter added that he’s prepping for the second round of the playoffs by purchasing dozens of cheap glasses from the local thrift store, which he … [Read more...] about Bruins Fan Celebrates Victory Over Capitals By Happily Punching New Hole In Wall
Gov. Baker Announces Statewide Bacchanalian Sex Carnival Can Begin May 29
Content warning: crude language BOSTON—In an official statement from Beacon Hill, Governor Charlie Baker announced that Massachusetts will host its first annual statewide bacchanalian sex carnival at 100% capacity on May 29. “I am pleased to inform the citizens of Massachusetts that, after a year of hardship, sacrifice, and diligence, they can rip off their masks with … [Read more...] about Gov. Baker Announces Statewide Bacchanalian Sex Carnival Can Begin May 29
“Free Solo” Sequel To Star 2002 Prius That Scaled Mt. Washington
National Geographic announced today that the sequel to the critically acclaimed climbing film “Free Solo” will feature the thrilling story of a 2002 Prius summiting the legendary Mt. Washington without any assistance. The movie will showcase real, often terrifying footage from the dramatic climb. “A brave hand-me-down Prius takes on harsh paved and gravel roads that no … [Read more...] about “Free Solo” Sequel To Star 2002 Prius That Scaled Mt. Washington