As made clear by its waxy sheen and plump leaves, your succulent is absolutely loving its total lack of hydration and dearth of love and affection. It’s too bad those same conditions are literally killing you. … [Read more...] about Succulent Thriving On No Water And Zero Attention, Unlike You
Woman Not Sure If Boston Man Is Flirting Or Just Yelling At Her
Either way, get the hell out of my face, buddy. … [Read more...] about Woman Not Sure If Boston Man Is Flirting Or Just Yelling At Her
Melania Bastes White House Turkey With Remdesivir To Cure Meat
“This is a great cure, it is a miracle cure,” noted the First Lady, admiring the roasted turkey, which appeared to be squirming on the platter. “And the flavor will pair perfectly with Ivanka’s hydroxychloroquine stuffing and Don Jr.’s antibody gin cocktail.” At press time, White House chefs were busy preparing the final course: a roasted lame duck. … [Read more...] about Melania Bastes White House Turkey With Remdesivir To Cure Meat
Kink-Shaming? I Got Kicked Out Of CVS For Wearing My Fishnet Mask
I can’t believe this. I thought it was 2020, and I could choose how to dress without judgement or persecution. Apparently not. Because when I walked into CVS with my fishnet mask, I was asked to leave immediately! I simply don’t understand the problem. The sexy mask goes over my nose and mouth. And sure, it shows a little skin, and my lips, and both my nostrils, but why … [Read more...] about Kink-Shaming? I Got Kicked Out Of CVS For Wearing My Fishnet Mask
Trump Transition Team Assures Nation Of Smooth Transition To Autocracy
Despite losing the presidential election, the Trump administration announced today they will ensure the transition of America from a democracy to a monarchical autocracy proceeds as seemlessly as possible. We would like to guarantee all Americans that the nation will smoothly shift from the administration of President Trump to the eternal dynasty of King Trump I,” said … [Read more...] about Trump Transition Team Assures Nation Of Smooth Transition To Autocracy