Medical experts were baffled on Wednesday after local Celtics fan Brad Barry arrived at the ER literally bleeding green.
“Tonight’s the first night of the season and I’m stuck at Mass General for some nothing nosebleed, this is total BS,” said Barry, dripping viridian blood all over his Marcus Smart jersey.
“These brainiac doctors think I’m sick, but I keep telling them to discharge me so I can watch tonight’s game at home alone like I always do. I’m superstitious and like to scream at the TV when Tatum air balls threes, or when he hits them.”
At press time, Barry was seen calling his bookie to place multiple outlandish Celtics parlay bets, but thankfully passed out before he finished dialing.
