DEDHAM, MA - In a horrifying display of short-term memory, your dumbass friend has assured you a trip to New Hampshire will totally be fun this time around. “Come on, it’ll be great! We can do a few nights of camping in the White Mountains,” said the imbecile, seemingly forgetting about how you almost drowned in the Saco River after a failed canoe expedition last time you … [Read more...] about Friend Assures You Visiting New Hampshire Will Actually Be Fun This Time
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Marcus Smart Spotted Dumping Dead Hopes And Dreams Of Raptors Into Charles River
The star Celtics player, whose crucial block late in the fourth quarter murdered any chance of a Toronto championship repeat, said it was an honor to dispose of the Raptors remains into Boston's largest trash repository. … [Read more...] about Marcus Smart Spotted Dumping Dead Hopes And Dreams Of Raptors Into Charles River
EXCLUSIVE: We Interviewed The Elf Who Announces Each Stop For The MBTA
BOSTON, MA – Ever wondered who reads the gargled MBTA stop names you strain to hear each morning? Look no further than Peppermint Sugarplum, the little elf who lives inside the T train speakers. This week, we tracked down the spritely and elusive elf for an exclusive interview about his job, life, and motivations. “My career started when the faeries, beasties, and elves were … [Read more...] about EXCLUSIVE: We Interviewed The Elf Who Announces Each Stop For The MBTA
Man Starts Family, Builds House, Retires All While Sitting In Labor Day Cape Traffic
Now 92 years old, the man finally reached Provincetown this morning, only to die of old age by afternoon. Headline by contributor Bailey Hull … [Read more...] about Man Starts Family, Builds House, Retires All While Sitting In Labor Day Cape Traffic
“Comedic Genius” Nancy Pelosi Endorses Joe Kennedy As A Bit
In an unexpected move, Nancy Pelosi “totally punked” Massachusetts politicos on Thursday afternoon by endorsing Joe Kennedy III over incumbent Ed Markey in the Commonwealth’s hotly contested Democratic primary for US Senate. Her statement was widely met with confusion, as it contradicted the Democratic Party policy to endorse incumbent candidates. But according to unnamed … [Read more...] about “Comedic Genius” Nancy Pelosi Endorses Joe Kennedy As A Bit