A local Ebenezer Scrooge was recently spotted ruining Allston Christmas by stealing all the best street gifts using a large green truck. “I saw him take a totally decent, formerly-white couch and just drive off,” stated one shaken onlooker. “He took stuff from literally every house. What a greedy jerk.” The thief, who called himself “the garbageman,” was seen taking his … [Read more...] about Allston Christmas Grinch Takes All The Good Presents For Himself
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Scientists Warn Climate Change May Extend Iced Coffee Season Indefinitely
“Our planet is not ready for the disastrous possibility that iced coffee season will soon be all year round,” said an MIT climate scientist, who led the research. “Heat wave after record heat wave, our country is turning to iced coffee permanently as a makeshift solution to cool off. But we simply do not have the resources to support this change on a global … [Read more...] about Scientists Warn Climate Change May Extend Iced Coffee Season Indefinitely
“Free Solo” Sequel To Star 2002 Prius That Scaled Mt. Washington
National Geographic announced today that the sequel to the critically acclaimed climbing film “Free Solo” will feature the thrilling story of a 2002 Prius summiting the legendary Mt. Washington without any assistance. The movie will showcase real, often terrifying footage from the dramatic climb. “A brave hand-me-down Prius takes on harsh paved and gravel roads that no … [Read more...] about “Free Solo” Sequel To Star 2002 Prius That Scaled Mt. Washington
Previously Masked Neighbors Suddenly No Longer Flirting
“It’s not that the bottom half of his face is unattractive, it’s just not what I had in mind during the past ten months of casual masked conversation.” … [Read more...] about Previously Masked Neighbors Suddenly No Longer Flirting
Finally, A United Nation: 100% Of Americans Agree They’d Rather See Jake Paul Get Knocked Out Than Receive Another Stimulus Check
“America may be more divided than ever, but it appears we all agree on one thing: wanting to see Jake Paul get his long overdue comeuppance,” said Pew research Dan Hinkley, who ran the survey. “Astonishingly, 70% of Americans said they would even pay their last stimulus check back to the government if it meant they got to see Jake getting rocked in the kisser by a ‘decent … [Read more...] about Finally, A United Nation: 100% Of Americans Agree They’d Rather See Jake Paul Get Knocked Out Than Receive Another Stimulus Check