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The Boston Accent

New England’s Source For Wicked Serious News

Hingham Woman Never Thought She Had An Accent Until She Tried Speech-To-Text

May 17, 2023 by Dan Bookbinder Leave a Comment

Hingham, MA—Dental Office Receptionist Danielle Hurley left her entire office befuddled and herself humbled after messaging her employers via speech-to-text. 

Office Manager Sarah Viera received the following text on Wednesday morning: “Hey Eli Doctor. Pretty Love, I’m sorry, but I’m guava be like today. Went to Marquette basket after dog last night to get sum cold cuts for grind dust for lunch and small fashion colors for sale of his birthday, but Jason Corolla Range Rower the size of a wheel I took the spot. I’ve had a spout savour as a chair since November sew I had to pop down the harbor this morning and dig out, so I’m a bee bit lay.”

The staff of the offices of Dr. Hugh Breedlove, DDS reviewed the message, but could not ascertain the meaning.

“Dani is a great employee, a wonderful person, and the patients love her,” Dr. Breedlove said. “But that message left me dumbfounded. I didn’t know if it was a resignation or an insult. I had to ask the rest of my staff if it was Gen-Z slang or a TikTok challenge.”

But no one in the office could decipher this cryptic message, and were confused when Hurley arrived and started her day as normal.

“I went to Derby and Notre Dame Academy then to BC and no one ever said I talked weird.” Hurley said when faced with her message. “Jeezum Crow, alls I was saying was that when I went to Market Basket for some lunch meat and crullers for Sara V’s Birthday, but someone in a Range Rover took my spot even though I had a saver. I parked six blocks away, then had to dig out this morning.”

All was forgiven at the office, though the celebratory treats sparked a heated debate over the best doughnuts, which has yet to be resolved.

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